If you’re a doubter or a hater, we understand. On the surface of things, secure data destruction can seem unexciting. But (straight-face on) we think it is fun. “Why?” You may legitimately ask. Well, that’s what we’re here to tell you.
We’re professionals in destruction
How many times in life can you say you’re going to destroy something today? Unless your name is Arnold Schwarzenegger or you create machines with CO2-powered axes for Robot Wars. Not only do we get to destroy things for a living – not just paper but microfiche and microfilm, hard drives and backup tapes – we get to hand out Certificates of Destruction to our clients. They’re a lot more interesting than invoices.
It’s serious business
Serious is the polar-opposite of fun, right? Not always. Because the security of data is so essential, the technicians at SFS have signed the Official Secrets Act. Which basically puts us on par with MI5. And the fun doesn’t stop there. We’re talking security-sealed bags, wiping hard-drives with powerful electro-magnetic currents (it’s called degaussing, fact-fans), and saying lines like, “Take it to the incinerator.” Does it sound like the best job in the world yet?
We complete the circle of life
When destroying paper documents, we use a state-of-the-art cross shredder that blitzes everything into confetti then pulps the results. It truly is a celebration worth attending. All data has a death day and we are the gatekeepers who see it off into the great beyond. For paper that great beyond involves becoming tissue paper – it’s like an ironic form of reincarnation. The late documents may become art supplies or a handy cure for a runny nose. It’s a fascinating analogy that you can interpret how you wish.
This is MoD level destruction
Seriously, forget your average office shredder. Our techniques are next level. We can reduce microfiche to powder (try sticking those fragments back together, corporate spies!), shred backup tapes into 20mm or even 6mm scraps, smash up CDs and DVDs into tiny little chips and incinerate pretty much anything (so long as it’s legal – if you’re thinking of bumping someone off, we’re not the company for you). And the best bit is that we can do all of this on site – yes, even the incineration – so none of your top secret data need leave your care for a moment.
We are the digital Marie Kondo
Thanks to the newly-famed Japanese organising guru, the world is discovering that tidying is an opportunity to choose joy. We may not have our own Netflix show yet, but we like to think that we bring joy into people’s lives by reducing the clutter. It’s not just saving people money on storage costs, its creating space for other things in life, like fun. Think of all the things you’ll be able to do with an empty office. It’s satisfying to give that to people. Plus, we digital spring clean whilst humming the tune to “A Spoonful of Sugar.” We’re still waiting on Mary Poppins to show us how to sing it properly though.
We herald the digital age
Just as a rock musician takes pleasure in smashing their guitar on the ground after a concert, we take great pleasure in annihilating the paper, CDs and DVDs of this world. Paper has been an amazing friend to us all. It’s been with us since 100BC and has seen us through many a century, but a couple of millennia is long enough. Likewise, DVDs and CDs were kind to us in the analogue years, but they probably shouldn’t be clogging the archives anymore. Secure Data Destruction is a fitting send off, heralding the digital age in a shower of confetti, a blaze of fire or an electro-magnetic hurrah.
If you need help with secure data destruction of any kind, contact us today for a quote.